lamminghong

Interesting.

2011-02-20T07:30:00.002+10:00

Goodbye Jetta! It's been fun, but it's time to move on.

I promise I'll blog more if I end up going to Canada (not counting my chickens before they hatch haha!). Waiting for the last things in the approval process to go through - the tick from U of T to say that they'll accept me!

In any case, uni is starting again and I'm super stoked to be doing subjects with all my silly 4th year friends. Yeah, you guys, you're silly!

- Michael

Wicked.

2011-01-29T08:19:00.002+10:00

First post for a while, I know.

I've finally been accepted into UQ exchange hooray! So I now need to fill in more forms (because they're too lazy to share information. Strange, I know...) and get that off to UQabroad by Monday. Lame.

Went and saw Wicked (again!) last night - in Brisbane! Woo! Hooray for the Brisbane arts scene, being able to host such a major musical (they weren't going to come originally, so this is awesome for us).

It was pretty good - particularly the lead roles, which were characterised amazingly and sung (well, with the exception of the lady who couldn't sing but had a lead role). Bert Newton was wonderful (haha, get it?) as the Wizard - he brought so much life into the role.

There were a lot of irritating things about the production, however. Of note were the moments where the orchestra was scored for strings, but of course, all you had were tremolo keyboards, which were being played by pianists who didn't really care about the way tremolo strings sounded. The orchestra sounded really thin - there were parts missing from the full score, particularly a lot of brass chorale writing. There were lots of issues with the sound production - the whole cast were EQ'd incorrectly - you couldn't hear the chorus properly and the two leads were creating destructive interference with each other. Someone's being paid to make sure that things like that don't happen! FIX IT

Also, the flautist couldn't rhythm and couldn't tune his/her piccolo, meaning a lot of the high stuff was laggy and out of tune. Ahh well, I love being a music student.

The orchestra weren't credited anywhere, which was interesting. You'd think that they'd be treated at the same level as the sound production team, but, no...

But still, it made for a very very enjoyable night.

Lame.

2010-12-28T15:47:00.001+10:00

University of Toronto is slow.

I am very happy to tell you that you all meet the eligibility criteria of UQ Abroad, so we are intending to accept you into the UQ Abroad program, but the host university that we will be able to nominate you for is not yet determined. The University of Toronto has been a popular host university preference for semester 2, 2011 but there are only limited places available, so we are trying to find alternative host universities for the applicants who are not able to be nominated for the University of Toronto.

So I think I'll just have to hope, and hold my breath....

Who I am.

2010-11-24T22:31:00.004+10:00

On one hand, a very old Russian man, who has worked and collaborated with greats such as Rostropovich and Knushevitsky, and on the other hand, me, who is hoping that one day I can do the same. Communicating through the waving of his hand, and single word sentences (recognisable language notwithstanding), he was able to impart his vision of a piece to me, all those years ago.

An ability to speak without words - to empathise and to express without language, is why I chose to do a music degree. To learn to interpret and communicate through something that you do not see or hear directly - I find this to be highly compelling and incredibly powerful.

Music isn't just about something that I study as a hobby. It's a lot more powerful, a lot more integral to the way people live. A lot of people define themselves by what music they listen to, or produce. To be able to study it with an open mind is a great blessing to me - and God has blessed me with the ability to produce and to interpret music.

Am I wasting my time? From a practical point of view, music has absolutely nothing to do with medicine. Music is linked very strongly to that which you cannot define - the soul, the emotion, the psyche of a person. It helps one understand what cannot be taught. In such a way, it's much more beneficial to me than any Science degree could have been.

Studyyyyyy loungeeeee

2010-11-08T17:14:00.003+10:00

Everybody!

Get Excited!

Study Lounge is in the works at Coopers Plains Public Library for the year 2011!

:D

www.studylounge.org - check it out!

Canadia

2010-11-02T08:51:00.002+10:00

Hello Guys,
It's been a while.

I've just submitted my UQ Abroad application, and I'm stoked because it means there is something which I can aim for in the future. There's so much more world out there, and we are so content to sit in this corner of the world and say that we are doing fine. Canada, here I come - there's lots of leaves to be stomped on and lots of Winter there, so I'm incredibly excited. Nine months to wait now...

I've been contemplating what I'll end up doing, because BMus / MBBS is a ridiculously long career path that will eat up my next decade of my life. I have a sneaking suspicion that I'll finish this course, and go to bible school. It's like that feeling I had, back in grade seven, that I'd go and do a dual degree in Music and Medicine. God's made that possible (even though back then it was impossible) and, honestly, I'm not surprised.

If you guys would like to join in, Operation Christmas Child need volunteers at their warehouse! We're going this friday :) so if you'd like to come, meet us there. Their address is Gate 2, 167 Hyde Road, Yeronga. Wear closed in shoes and bring a waterbottle.

- Michael

Creepy Stalker

2010-08-18T19:57:00.004+10:00

Well, God has been kind to me, and has allowed me to share my faith with many people lately. Pray pray pray *pray* that it will go well - that God will change their hearts and show them His awesome power and glory :). It's hard, because (as the UQ Music bible study leader says) there are people who you don't want to share the word of God with. Because we are so prideful and so caught up in hating (or liking too much) who they are for us to want them to change.

This sort of attitude has got to stop. Be bold and share your faith, guys. A hundred years is a very very very short time, especially when you go about it a day at a time. If you are living the Christian walk, remember that we're given the commission to go out and make disciples of all nations. In doing that, we proclaim the amazing power of salvation to the world. If we hide behind our inhibitions, we miss the chance to show God's amazing love to people.

Life has been pretty good at the moment (ignoring everything that's happened in the last year and a half) - things like cartown, Dvorak concertos, Shostakovich, AYO excerpts, the Brodsky Quartet, mum coming home, having amazing friends and managing to just keep going.

Prayers to my friend Zoe - who faces a similar dilemma to mine. Pray for healing for her, she needs it way more than I do.

Ravel's String Quartet makes me happy, and I hope it makes you happy as well.
- Michael

Motivation

2010-07-03T17:50:00.001+10:00

Well, all my motivation seems to have died.

Meh.

As a musician, no motivation means that ultimately you lose.
No motivation means that you've stopped caring.

So how do I fix this?

Post.

2010-05-09T23:17:00.003+10:00

I'm really getting worried that I'm developing mannerisms of the people around me. Sometimes these mannerisms are positive (like obsessive practicing attitudes, ability to make routines) but a lot of them are not healthy, such as swearing and driving impolitely. I think it's time that I really addressed who I hang around with and who I spend my spare time with, because if these habits develop they'll be really difficult to get out of my system.

I'm also quite disillusioned with the whole symphony orchestra ideal nowadays. I don't want to be an orchestral musician because I'll be forced to play a lot of crap I don't enjoy (such is the life of someone who wants to be a modernist). Playing in a quartet is my goal, but I don't know if I can achieve this before I go do medicine, which is unfortunate. I've also rediscovered my love for playing in pit orchestras (why? the music is a bit repetitive and sometimes really cliche, but they - especially amateur groups - are always so enthusiastic and have so much fun). The Wiz was a lot of fun, and it was great to catch up with everybody at school. It also reminded me, however, that I wasn't really that much more mature than any of the guys there.

AND I FINALLY HAVE SOME VERY FAIL COOKING SKILLZ.

Over this week I've also rediscovered a friend, had a great time avoiding flowers and had a lovely day on Sunday with my mumsy. Love you, mum, although this blog is probably the one aspect of my online life that you haven't discovered yet :P HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

Girls.

2010-03-31T00:48:00.001+10:00

Help.

My Sickness, 11-and-3/4-months-on

2010-03-22T00:44:00.004+10:00

Easterfest will mark a first complete year of my sickness.

It's funny how it's all played out - how this sickness stopped me from doing anything stupid during our family issues, how it has been a blessing in disguise, how it's completely changed my viewpoint on life. I have had the chance to grow and mature as a Christian this year.

Or, as a good friend put it, I had the winning ticket for the lottery, one which bestows upon me a priceless gift.

I'm past the point where I regard this sickness more as a burden than a blessing. God works in funny ways - and He shows me that even though I'm going through all this suffering, He's with me every step of the way.

(For those of you who point out that God is the one that did this to me, refer to the massive silver lining that I've noticed.)

My life will, eventually, get back on track.

Prayers go out this week to my friend Stanley, to brother Martin Fung's family, for mum's trip to Hong Kong, and also my friends Katie, Viv, Lilian, Robert and Patria. If you can, pray for these people too - they need guidance and support through the rough patches of life.

Out of Breath.

2010-03-15T00:05:00.003+10:00

Today marks the first time I have been out of breath for about a year.

While I did it, I felt like I was being bitten by three thousand sandflies simultaneously.

Afterwards, God sent me a gigantic freezing shower of rain.

I loved playing hockey, and I thank you guys for being so supportive of my whimsical decision!

Dear God,

Thank you for sustaining me today during 3PASS!

Yours Truly,
Michael.

Quiet.

2010-03-09T22:47:00.002+10:00

It's really quiet right now, as I readjust to living alone. It's hard, going from a frantic time of having all our rellies over, all the way to just me talking to me and my cello. I've also been watching my diet (not really changing what I eat, just taking note of exactly what I eat), as I suspect that something in my diet makes my allergy horrible. AND I THINK IT'S YOGHURT >_<

I like yoghurt...

It gives me a lot of time to enjoy talking to God and enjoy having His presence around me. Although I admit I still find it hard to adapt to being alone. :P Also this sunlight is annoying, because it means I have to walk sideways and try and avoid it.

But I love my life, and I wouldn't be anybody else even if I could!

Stress.

2010-03-04T22:13:00.002+10:00

So nowadays I'm about 500000% stressed and I'm loving uni all the same. However, what I think is a biiiiiig issue is that I make myself this stressed, for no reason at all. Also, it triggers my allergy, which is fun.

Anybody got any ideas on how to relax? I subconcsiously stress and, before I know it, my skin starts to prickle. It doesn't help if the weather is wet or too hot, because then I anticipate my allergy and get stressed anyway.

Hoping you guys have had an awesome first week at uni! And for those of you who are music students or if you know music students, tell them to come down to the MUSIC BIBLE STUDY (run as part of StudentLife at uQ), held on monday 3 - 4!

Phew. Time goes by.

2010-03-03T20:55:00.005+10:00

It's been a while since I posted on this blog, and I've intentionally done that so as not to write anything that may or may not offend people left, right and centre, particularly those closest to me. I hope you guys haven't missed this blog (I haven't! hehe... ahh well).

To catch up with the times, I've been to Hong Kong, I've been to Japan, I've had amazing lifechanging experiences and I've seen God working throughout these months. Although it's been a tough time, I find that it's comforting that He's everywhere that you'll ever be, and He's working through people all around the world.

I was recently playing through a Japanese hack and slash game (both hilarious and mindless!) and I'm pretty amazed by what I can learn. Oda Nobunaga, the shogun who unfied Japan in the Sengoku period of Japanese history (the 1500s - 1600s), was a pretty awesome guy who supported the Spanish and Portuguese missionaries when they first had contact with Japan, although he never converted to Christianity.

Succeeding Nobunaga, though, came a guy called Toyotomi Hideyoshi. This guy was banished Christian missionaries from Kyushu during his rule, to seize more power. After that, Hideyoshi didn't like the fact that the Christians were quite influential and that they bickered somewhat (Spanish or Portuguese Christianity?). He was also wary of the fact that a lot of Japanese people were abandoning their cultural beliefs to follow Christianity - so he had 26 Christians crucified publicly, in Nagasaki, as an example of what would happen. Christianity was then banned, and all known followers were executed.

This depressing occurrence drove almost all the Christians in Japan underground. However, in history, Christ's message always survives in the face of persecution. We can see this in the early church, in the church in Asia and Africa. It is a message of hope, of love, and is eternally binding and wonderful.

When Christian missionaries returned to Japan, in the late 1800s, what they found was an amazing community of 'hidden Christians'. It's incredible to see that Christianity was so integral to this group of people that they worked even under severe persecution to spread the message of the Gospel.

I was actually astounded to see churches in Japan dating back to the 1800s, especially as I always thought of Japan as a Buddhist, Shinto or increasingly Secular country. However, it's a magnificent and wonderful thing that it has roots in the country going back so long.

It's also a great reminder that we should never give up on China. We should never give up on Africa. Because the message of the gospel is there, alive and well, and it needs to be shouted from the mountaintops.

The awesome Russian Orthodox church in Hakodate, Japan

Being Dead

2009-12-26T02:12:00.002+10:00

Today I went to visit Grandpa's ashes. While this is a very sentimental thing to do, it was very powerful because we read a poem on another lady's ashes.

Unfortunately I can't translate poems and keep them poems, so I'll give you a very rough translation of it!

It read.

Don't come here with sorrow.
Don't look for me here, as I am not here.
I am now with the Lord in heaven.
If you want to meet me someday, become a Christian.
Then we will see each other when you finally pass away.

Something about this poem is just so simply beautiful. :)

Thoughts

2009-12-19T01:21:00.002+10:00

For the first time, I've seriously contemplated whether God is telling me to give up playing the cello and take up something else. I haven't felt a calling towards studying ministry yet, but that's one of the paths that I could take...

And I'm scared. And I'm resistant to the idea. And I feel selfish for even thinking that I have some semblance of control over my future. I feel like I'm being forced into a decision that I don't want to make, and I'm not ready to make it either. There are so many things that have contributed to my general lack of well-being.

I've been praying lately for healing, but it doesn't come instantaneously.

I know, I know...

2009-12-16T20:40:00.002+10:00

I know I've been slack with posts lately, but it's pretty much because there is so much on my mind that I've given up trying to compartmentalise and have, as a result, have frozen.

Hong Kong culture catches up with you really quickly - an extreme case of materialism, liberalism and instant gratification. However, what I'm really interested in is WHY there are so many more sincere christians in Hong Kong than there are in Australia.

Christianity is a funny thing. You'd think, especially in a culture such as this, that less people would be inclined to spend time worshipping the Lord and His works, and instead focus on the things that define us as Asians. Posessions, good marks, honour, highest rank in the social ladder. It seems that the more we have, the less we really need... but it shows that people here need God a lot more than the people do back home, where everything is just comfortable and nice.

Just some food for thought.

I've enjoyed the cooler climate so far, but my itch hasn't actually gotten any better :(. Chances are, I won't get better before I go to Japan... no skiing for me, perhaps? EPIC SAD FACE.

Only time will tell.

Finishhhh!

2009-11-18T23:28:00.003+10:00

Today was my recital - and I thank everybody so much who was there! I hope that you weren't too scared by my music to come to the ones in subsequent years... Music is a fickle profession - where everything depends on the performance. It's incredibly intense and so much fun.

I thank God for helping me through my recital - He's always been there for me and always will.

I'm exhausted, so I think it's sleeptime for me. :)

So yeah...

2009-11-16T22:48:00.003+10:00

Hey look! I'm almost not a newbie at uni anymore! :D. Scary. Just 7 more of these to go, and then I'll have two pieces of paper which means I can butcher people's ears literally and figuratively. So... in this time of huge stress for everybody, it's hard to rely on God to get anything done. A good way of reminding yourself that God's in charge is to pray before your exam!

Anyhow, yes. Just a little pitch for my recital on Wednesday - Zelman Cowen building (51), Nixon Room (434), 2:20pm! Get ready to hear some awesome music (romantic and avant-garde modern. Muhahaha. Go die, baroque and classical...) that will (again, God willing) be hopefully allergy and face-wince free. Here's hoping.

So yes. It's been a big year, and God has gotten me through all my trials so far. If it were just me, I would have given up a long time ago. Thank goodness for the unending love and mercy He shows me.

God's timing is impeccable

2009-11-12T21:49:00.006+10:00

This year I've been praying and it never seems like I get what I pray for. My prayers are answered, but it seems like God answers them in the way He sees fit. And one thing I've definitely learned this year is that God is sovereign (it's a message that keeps being talked about in my life, again and again and again.)

Again, God's shown me that He is in control and that he makes arrangements just so that He can remind me that He's taking care of me. (For example, putting christians around in day-to-day activities, to talk to me about things that I needed reminding).

Today was the most awesome experience - I got the chance to make a recording for an advert, and have my face pasted. Playing in front of a green screen... it was awesome fun and an awesome experience. It just turned out that my go-to guy for anything I needed figured out that I was a christian... well, God's timing is perfect.

I guess I can take something from that - my illness is really irritating me, but again it's God's timing. I'm thankful that there is still so much to learn from this illness, even though it's quite painful and depressing... ahh well, growing up, here I come.

I've got the geek....

2009-11-06T00:02:00.002+10:00

Somehow I felt like being a music critic today, so what better way to express myself than through lovely practical class reviews and lunchtime concert reviews? Much enjoyment was to be had by writing nasty scathing reviews of some horrid lunchtime concerts, and it's actually great fun reliving the whole concert business as it brought back memories of watching various piano lecturers sit there with strange expressions on their face.

Amazing piano lecturers, that is.

The pianist playing was amazingly and horrifyingly amusingly bad.

I know that I shouldn't delight in such things, but I have to admire people who are courageous (or reckless, or perhaps ignorant) enough to stand up and play an unprepared program in front of a packed hall. For a musician, not being prepared is not respecting your audience.

Similarly, as a Christian, if we are not prepared then we aren't respecting God, or our missions field. I guess what we need is MOAR TRAINING! Working on it...

Silence

2009-11-01T23:38:00.002+10:00

I think perhaps the hardest thing to get used to when you live by yourself is the silence. I grew up with lots of people in the house (there were people making noise at any time of the day!) and this silence is a little bit creepy. Although, since my new place is rather small, it's not as bad as it would be if my place was huge and echoey.

I'm having a few issues with assessment - mainly that I can't get my head around this exam I have tomorrow morning (heh, I *can* reschedule, but that's a little beside the point, isn't it?). I think the best thing I could do now is to sleep. Maybe after a few hours nap I could get my brain working again.

I also feel like I'm on the mend illness wise, but again, it's all relative. Summer's also staring me in the face (I don't like going outside.) and that makes for good fun when going to and from uni. Thank goodness for buses and shade. I'd use an umbrella if it gets any hotter, much at the expense of my dignity.

We shall be organising Operation Christmas Child stuff soon! So never fear - a massed email will inevitably end up in your inbox sometime soon. And firefox tells me that inbox isn't a word... how ironic.

1 Timothy!

2009-10-21T23:00:00.002+10:00

So, we've just finished studying 1 Timothy in men's group at uni. As part of the conclusion, we were asked "if someone asked what you studied in 1 Timothy, what would you say?" I'm writing this more for my own benefit, but it *should* hopefully be a nice and succinct summary of this awesome little book!

1 Timothy is a letter written by the apostle Paul to his protege, Timothy, who is currently (at the time of writing... haha) based in Ephesus. In this letter, he seeks to instruct Timothy on how to lead and mentor the church in Ephesus, as their Christian walk did not get off to a very good start. There are instructions in this letter on the structure of the church, widows, money and leadership.

I think 1 Timothy is a pretty awesome book, myself. It's quite in-depth and up-front about everything - and it's also really good to read and remind yourself how to live more like Paul and Timothy. These guys are great examples of the Christian life, and we should seek to emulate them more :)

Moving Out

2009-10-15T00:07:00.003+10:00

Moving out of home is never easy, especially when it's just so new and everything sort of happens at once. I don't know how people deal with it to begin with, but I guess these first two or three weeks will be tricky and then we'll get into some sort of routine. Then it'll be ok.

I find myself getting increasingly agitated when things don't happen the way I want them to. It's also frustrating to deal with about a hundred things at once while trying to remain sane. And don't get me started about planning meals! I have really fully appreciated what mum had always done in my life, and I had taken all that for granted. This is a good experience for me.

I just need to make sure I don't get too self-obsessed and pedantic about all the little things. I know that everybody around me is a little frustrated and trying really hard to deal with it, and I know that I have a tendency to get annoyed easily. I think prayer will help me get through this tricky time and get used to everything that's happening around.

We'll get through it though. Thanks everybody for being so awesome :)

Prayer

2009-10-12T23:02:00.003+10:00

Having my own prayers answered literally is something that I am rather scared about. Earlier this year, in my own selfish sort of way, I prayed for two specific things: that I would have the chance to learn how to be independent, and also the chance to learn to love and respect my brothers.

These prayers were answered in a way that I did NOT like.

But what's the big picture? I finally get why God didn't let me get into USYD. I finally get why everything I did in January felt like a big failure (it was a big failure). It was preparing me for the struggle that I'm going through now.

Prayer is a powerful weapon. Use it well and use it wisely - and only ever pray about the things you mean. I didn't know what I wanted, and yet God showed me the right way forward. It seems unfair to me now, but it can only get better from here! :)

Yeah, I could...

2009-10-08T00:07:00.004+10:00

I could make a new layout, but I guess that'll come when I have time and nothing else to do. Maybe soon.

Just a few things to thank God for today: Rain to wash all the dust away. Finding out another way to help my allergy. Having dinner with Chris for the first time at home. Men's ministry and talks about church finance. Overcast weather (I like that one). Fridge! Microwave! Oven!

I ran into another good friend at the bus stop today - and she and I had a chat. Through this chat she helped me understand how much I am blessed to have the family that I have, to have awesome brothers, the world's best mother and a father who is able to provide for my family. Also, she really gave me a perspective on missionary work and a future role for someone like me.

:) I'm really looking forward to the next eight-or-so years. Let's see how it'll turn out.

*I'll make a new banner tomorrow, I think

Evangelism Practical

2009-10-06T23:40:00.002+10:00

I've been praying, on and off, for God to give me a good chance to evangelise this year. I've always been interested in doing so, especially putting my faith and beliefs on the line and letting God do His work. Yesterday I had the chance to do so, and it was actually such an awesome experience that I needed to reflect on it (hence no post yesterday).

I've known this friend for a while. He went to my high school, and pretty much was a typical asian kid (asians know that there are a few levels of typical asian kids - and they're divided into school grades, aren't they?). He regularly got B+'s and B's on his high school report, struggled on and off with thoughts of suicide and had a destructive relationship with his parents, who pretty much tried to stuff him into a mold that he didn't fit.

I guess us asian people know that asian parents (especially fathers) have a nasty habit of having huge expectations of their kids. The only success is an A+ on your report, the highest marks or the best performance. Anything else is an absolute failure. These expectations are heaped up on top of young asian kids as motivation for study. For me, my parents never forced me to do anything (I struggled with the inference of their expectations though).

Of course you won't get the best marks and the strongest performance. There's always someone better than you. In some asian families, that isn't good enough - and in my friend's case, his parents never encouraged and only berated. (I'm going from what he told me - and it could be different).

I ran into him on the bus (I hardly ever take the bus, and almost never at 4pm). I'm pretty sure God put the words into my mouth - and before I knew it I asked if he wanted to get off at my stop and I'd drive him home.

Before long the topic of conversation turned to family, money, and religion. I had no idea what my own intentions were, except I came up with answers when there were no answers, and the like. God took care of me during that time, and I felt was leading me to talk to my friend about Jesus.

I guess what I've learned is that the best way to evangelise is to live the Christian walk. My agnostic cousin describes my mother as a Christian - and has the utmost respect for her and her beliefs. My cousin is impressed by the way my mother exemplifies the Christian faith - and it's amazing to see that someone who is so smitten by the world can still know where the light is shining from.

I'm praying for my friend - that God can come into his life and bring him to Jesus. And when God is ready to work through me, or a mutual friend, I'm prepared to do what it takes. As Pastor Chong said - the only reason why you became a Christian is that someone prayed for you. Don't give up, because we'll never know when.

Hmm!

2009-10-04T22:44:00.002+10:00

As Elaine very kindly reminded me, I have a blog. I forgot about it, having been ill all week! I hope you guys have had some much needed R+R before this coming term! ASSESSMENT >_<

I'm not sure if I remember any of my chemistry. Ahh well, shucks.

I guess the best part about turning 18 is that I finally the ability to sign my own consent form! ADULT DECISIONS here I come! I still haven't received my blue card yet though... maybe I'll have to give the weatherheads a call and ask about it.

:D I'll get back to writing serious stuff later, but I'm exhausted! thanks everybody who came to my party! And thank you for all the lovely gifts! :)

So yeah

2009-09-24T23:40:00.001+10:00

I'm off to Uni Fellowship Camp: Back to Basics! Can't wait :)
No post from me today. I hope you guys are well!
- Michael

Hmm...

2009-09-23T23:57:00.002+10:00

I didn't feel like I was specific enough with my rant about Catholicism. Here goes.

Catholics have an interesting view called the afterlife, with three different types of people. The ones that make it, the ones that don't, and the ones that are stuck in the middle. They committed too many sins to be allowed a free entrance into heaven, and as such have to go through a cycle of repentance and penance. This is one such example of unbiblical doctrine. Jesus has died for all of our sins (Read John 3:16!). It doesn't specify who is or isn't qualified for heaven. In short, we're all too sinful to be in heaven, but God is great and loving and lets us in because He loves us.

Catholics also worship the Virgin Mary. I personally find this really quite theologically lopsided (the whole worship of a human part). I know it's special that she is the mother of God, but in short she was just a woman chosen by God to fulfil a role in Jesus Christ's life. But why worship her? In short, Mary is a good example of one who is a Christian. But we shouldn't go and worship this said person - it's borderline idolatry.

Also adding to the extreme confusion is the existence of a Pope, one who is in control of the Catholic church in Rome (and through history, there have been many who were corrupt). We know Christ reconciles us to God, not a 'man in a funny hat'. The pope, again, is an excellent example of how to live as a Christian, but Catholics generally take that to the extreme and again into the realms of borderline idolatry.

And lastly, they have a few more books in their Bible. The books of Tobit, Judith, 1-3 Maccabees, Wisdom of Solomon, Sirach, Baruch and Greek additions to Esther and Daniel. As I haven't studied these books, I can't offer my own insight into them. However, many protestants disagree with the doctrine taught in these books, but admit to their use in a liturgical sense.

In short, Catholicism is a pretty different kettle of fish.

Hope you guys liked the dust storm today :D. I didn't.

ACK!

2009-09-22T17:59:00.006+10:00

Sorry for not posting yesterday! I was too engrossed in my pokemon-playing.

Today's topic is the difference between denominations of churches.

It's a bit of a questionable thing. If the Christian faith is so universal, so absolute, so true, then why are there denominations and, indeed, how do we as Christians minister to non-Christians when we can't even seem to make up our minds on the issues that matter?

Nowadays, the "Christian" faith is split up into three-and-a-half sections. Catholicism, Anglicanism and Protestantism (and Cults, if you'd like to count it as half a section). I am personally an Evangelical Protestant (hooray for Christian nomenclature!).

Catholics believe that their church was founded by Jesus Christ, who is also their spiritual head. The church was established in Rome by the apostle Peter, and is one of the world's oldest organisatons. In the 4th Century, Emperor Constantine made Christianity the official religion of the Roman empire, which later split due to disputes about the papal authority.

Personally, I have never understood where the Pope's authority comes from. Is it a man-made governing structure? From the New Testament, I have not ever read anything that tells of the ability for a man (who is not simultaneously God) to forgive someone's sin, the defined existence of a figurehead (who is nearly idolised) and the necessity of mass, liturgy, and the like.

In short, I don't agree with catholicism because it follows non-biblical doctrine.

But you'll find good Christians everywhere. There will always be God-fearing and loving men and women in every denomination. As Paul stresses - it doesn't matter what motive men are preaching from, what is important is that Jesus Christ is the message that is preached.

:D goodnight! Tomorrow - about anglicanism. If I have time.

Epic Flail

2009-09-20T23:07:00.003+10:00

Was reading the Bible yesterday - a passage from Mark (9:14-32). It recounts the story of a man whose son is possessed by an Evil Spirit. The symptoms of his possession are: (v 17-18) "... rob[bed] him of speech... throws him to the ground. He foams at the mouth, gnashes his teeth and becomes rigid." To me, this is actually a very accurate description of a condition I had as a little kid - epilepsy.

Many, many, many cultures regard conditions such as Epilepsy as a possession by an evil spirit. In the following passage, Jesus heals the child because the child's father had faith enough to ask for healing.

But to what degree should we rely alone on faith for healing? We hear these insane stories of sick people being healed at evangelical events. We hear stories of parents of sick kids refusing medical treatment for their children and instead prefer to kneel by their bedsides praying for a miracle.

Read: Mark 8:12, when Jesus was asked by Pharisees for a sign from heaven - "He (Jesus) sighed deeply and said, "Why does this generation ask for a miraculous sign? I tell you the truth, no sign will be given to it."" I read into this passage that God has given us everything that we need for a basis of faith. These two passages may be unrelated, but I personally feel that they are linked in some strange, abstract way.

My answer to people who believe only in faith healing - God created science and medicine for us to help ourselves. God gave us tools to help ourselves. We should not willingly go out and hurt ourselves by being too proud to accept what God has created.

I may have everything backwards. If htere are some inconsistencies in my argument feel free to tell me (and explain)! I was just intrigued by this passage and felt like I have to point it out. :)

The Soul

2009-09-19T22:53:00.002+10:00

I was wondering today - where has the Soul gone? In this day and age, it seems that all people care about are material possessions and their next rush of joy. Just switch on the television - almost every high-rated television show (except for the news) contains lewd behaviour and an extreme manifestation of greed.

Understanding the soul is pretty much undestanding the inate human-ness of being alive. The music of a society is also an expression of this understanding. Compare the musical histories of cultures that have experienced severe oppression and are on the mend (think of the African musical culture and also the culture of the African-Americans). You'll notice that there is a lot more depth to their music - a lot more emotion is poured into it.

Countries that were built upon teamwork and a dependence on others are also a lot more reliant on God. Faith is a lot stronger in places where it is not possible to outwardly proclaim a belief in Christ. In our fairness-centric society, our faith is so weak that we don't even want to call ourselves Christians in front of our peers or workplace.

End rant of the day.

The end times and the microchip

2009-09-18T15:37:00.007+10:00

HARRO! Been a bit of a stressful time, and I enjoy blogging but never seem to have enough time to write anything before I sleep. A change for today, I have the afternoon off (taking an easy day off at home). I guess I just wanted to research today's topic because it's fascinating and perhaps alluded to in the Bible.

The microchip fascinates me - given that if it could work perfectly with our bioreceptors and such it would never need replacing and it'd be good. Actually, the truth is a little bit more scary. The convenience of such a microchip would be astounding.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Microchip_implant (click on the link that says HUMAN). The benefits are exceedingly obvious, from simple monetary transactions to medical records and data readily available for identification and medical treatment. This in turn would speed up the rate of our lives (not necessarially a good thing! I personally find that I need days off or else I'll explode). Remember Pastor Shane's sermon last sunday? (Pastor Shane McCarthy spoke at BCAC last sunday, for all you non-BCACers who read my blog :P) He talked about instant gratification and the negative effects that it had on our society in general. The microchip would allow us to desire more and quicker. It's a simple thing, really.

There are two major problems with microchipping. Firstly, the lack of privacy, and secondly, the bible talks about microchips (OR SOMETHING EXTREMELY SIMILAR) in the book of Revelation. It may not be a microchip in itself (we'll see in the future) but, within the end time passages, the bible talks about a certain 'Mark of the Beast'. Its properties are rather similar to the microchip, which is slightly worrying.

Read: Revelation 13:16-17 - "He also forced everyone, small and great, rich and poor, to receive a mark on his right hand or on his forehead, so that no one could buy or sell unless he had the mark, which is the name of the beast or the number of his name". The number, we are told later, is either 666 or 616 (depending on your translation). Many Christians are wary of the fact that Revelation later states that those with the mark of the beast have chosen death.

Maybe I'm just overanalysing, but I'm pretty sure that given the events of the world currently, we can still say we haven't moved into the Tribulation period yet. And depending whether your view of the rapture is a pre-tribulation, mid-tribulation, or a post-tribulation one, we should all be taken up to meet God before it all takes place. Personally, I'm hoping for a pre-tribulation rapture, because then we get to avoid the seven years of Tribulation.

Since we aren't (or at least, I don't think we are) in the Tribulation yet, then Microchips aren't a problem to us. Keep your eyes peeled though!

Just for reference -

First 3 1/2 Years:
1. The Rapture takes place.
2. The Rise of Antichrist and the False Prophet.
3. The Third Temple is rebuilt in Jerusalem.
4. The Rise of Babylon.

5. The Rise of the false one-world religion.
6. The appearance of the two witnssesand the rise of the 144,000 Jewish evangelists.
7. The Seven Seal Judgments.
8. The Seven Trumpet Judgments.
Midpoint:
9. Death and Resurrection of the Two Witnesses.
10. Destruction of the One World Church.
11. The death and resurrection of Antichrist.
12. Antichrist defiles the temple and proclaims himself God.
13. The Mark of the Beast begins.
14. The Jewish Remnant flees to the desert.

Second 3 1/2 Years:
15. 7 Bowl Judgments
16. Martyrdom of Jews and Believers
17. Babylon is destroyed
18. Antichrist summons the world's armies to Armageddon
19. Battle of Armageddon
21. Return of Jesus Christ in Glory
22. Antichrist and the False Prophet are thrown into the Lake of Fire
23. Satan is bound for 1,000 years
24. Resurrection of Tribulation martyrs

End of the 7-year Tribulation.
25. Christ establishes His 1,000 kingdom.
26. Satan is released after 1,000 years.
27. Final Battle.
28. Satan, Death, and Hell are cast into the Lake of Fire.
29. Great White Throne Judgment (Final Judgment).
30. New heaven and earth. Eternity

(Taken from Wikipedia :D)

Alright, back to study for me. :) Hope you guys have a good week!

Hello again!

2009-09-09T23:17:00.002+10:00

Hello everyone! I'm starting to feel a little better now so I guess it will be business as usual. Just a few ideas for today:

Have you read the book of Daniel and the book of Revelation? I've read both- and I'd like to discuss it with someone. I know it's tough, but if someone's game for having their brains picked it would be a fun exercise and it would be well worth it. The end times is fascinating and quite scary.

God indeed does speak in visions - and it's comforting. Even the most well-meaning Christians rely on themselves too much - it's God who has the last say in everything! And, well, visions... they're quite mysterious, but it's a miracle to actually have one. Although, in Daniel 9:24, it says that visions and prophecies are 'sealed'... I wonder what that actually means?

I'll be continuing my rants about strange topics very soon. Or maybe I won't- if I'm being too audacious and 'controversial' tell me to back off. I mean it.

Hoping you guys are having a better month!

Michael can't help himself

2009-08-07T22:44:00.005+10:00

Epic epic epic screwup of the century.

I've got no ability to think anymore. I'm pretty much a mindless drone who drives around and does music rehearsals and does too many and ends up much worse off because of it. Would you believe I thought tomorrow was tuesday? I really did. No idea why.

My endless week is 5/7 over and it's still endless. I have never felt so stressed or so tired, and I just need a few days off. I think. It'll solve all my problems, but I can't take days off at any time during the week and I just lost my only spare morning.

Grumble.

I'm finding though that as long as I spend time with God, I feel better. All my problems simply go away for a while. It's nice and relaxing, and I have time to have a nice long chat to God about what I did today (not that He doesn't know!) and any desires that I might have (He knows already, but you still need to ask.) and any problems I may have had. The longer I spend, the less tired I feel, although sometimes I suddenly drift off and forget that I'm praying. I have to try and not do that haha.

Well, I have some things to try and resolve. Prayer helps, and it will always help. It's always worth spending more time in prayer. I need to change my habits

Nope... not today either

2009-08-06T23:18:00.002+10:00

No essay for you today, because I simply didn't feel like writing one. I think I won't write one till Sunday at least, when I actually have time.

Today I really felt the blessing of God. I may have screwed up majorly and gotten myself doublebooked, but God gave me the strength and peace to resolve it. I thank God for giving me friends who are willing to help me in my time of need, and for sustaining me through the day (I went for 10 hours without eating! Needless to say, I was quite hungry).

God simply defies logic. Whenever I fail, He picks me up and helps me back to my feet. And I fail quite a lot. I often get past the really really big hurdles but trip on the stupidest, most trivial things. God is always there for me, now and forever. :)

Exhausted

2009-08-05T23:16:00.002+10:00

Hey guys. I know it's only halfway through week 2, but I'm exhausted.

Pffft.

I guess this means there is no blog post today, huh. Although, after the essay that I posted yesterday, I'm actually drained. I won't be home until about 11 tomorrow, friday and saturday, so I don't know if I'll be able to post.

By the way, don't ever ever ever overcommit yourself. It's so simple - what happens is that you fall apart. And I'm warning you guys (you know who you are) who are near the overcommittment marker - look at what it did to me. I'm sick, can't exercise, can't sit in the sun for a while, can't walk from one building to another without turning orange. Please don't strain yourself. There are always so many beneficial things, but your health is paramount.

I praise God for giving me the chance to serve Him and help do His work in Brisbane. It's strange - nowadays I'm sometimes filled with the desire to go to Africa (seriously!) and serve there as a missionary... but I think the medicine degree comes first! No use going there and being a burden to everybody haha.

Anyhow, that's it from me! :D Goodnight

Evolution vs Creationism

2009-08-04T22:11:00.007+10:00

Harro everyone! Welcome to... *drumroll*
CREATION vs EVOLUTION as explored by the RICE Evangelism team (i.e. me.)! :D
To get this straight, I'm a Creationist. Also, an unapologetic apologetic. So I'm not an evolutionist.

Let's go to to what we call the 'absolute truths'. These are truths that Evolutionists, no matter how hard they try, cannot disprove, no matter how hardcore they are. Either that, or else the theories they try and come up with to counter these arguments are harder to accept than the existence of the Christian God to any rational scientist.

I know there are evolutionists who don't believe in the big bang, and also big bang theorists that don't believe in evolution, but in the effort to keep things simple I have generalised them into the same group. If this offends you, please contact me :)

Here are the truths.
1. The Universe has a beginning. It exists, so it must have a cause. This points to the existence of an intelligent designer.
2. The existence of life points to an intelligent designer, or a coincidence that can be mathematically expressed as something around the magnitude of 1:1x10^72.
3. The evolutionary theory is something that is almost non-salvageable at this time of scientific prowess.

These truths aren't many in number, but is succinct and easy to understand. Points 2 and 3 will be explored in greater detail in the next few posts. I'll attempt to provide a general overview of the topic, but if you want to know more then you have to research the topic yourself.

"The Universe has a Beginning"

It's nice. If the Universe has a beginning, then it surely requires a cause. If the universe is infinite, then it does not require a cause. Athiests, for years, have tried to disprove that the universe has a beginning. Mathematical reasoning can almost reduce the universe into a small, single point known as a singularity, a point where the dimensions of time and space collapse. This is a point that we have just before the big bang happens. Interestingly, we note, singularities are not just an object that science can't empirically deduce, can't prove and can't handle save for the use of abstract concepts such as infinity and the imaginary number.

Richard Dawkins, the noted athiest, used the imaginary number (for you non-maths geeks out there, it's the square root of negative one) to support his hypothesis that the universe did not have a beginning. As you can imagine, when you use a number that doesn't exist in any sort of physical application, it loses. In this sense, time and space start merging. If you take the imaginary number out, then the singularity appears again.

The singularity by itself is the greatest challenge for evolutionists and big-bang theorists. The appearance of this unscientific singularity is perhaps the most significant pointer to the existence of a divine and intelligent creator. Our God is not of our dimensions, and consequently transcends all these physical laws of time and space. With His absolute power and free will, He could make the universe appear in just a click.

The Big Bang theory is more interesting. The theory states that right after the singularity (i.e. right after the impossible, unscientific point) the whole universe exploded into being, elements were synthesised, stars were set into motion and the big cloud of dust formed into galaxies and solar systems. However, for this to happen, we'd have to have a lot of matter that suddenly just 'appears', like a rabbit from a hat. While the rabbit and the hat are a magic trick, matter cannot simply appear or disappear at will. Our physical laws are pretty adamant about that. A belief in the big bang theory requires more faith than a belief in the Christian God, a being so powerful that He could create the universe, all because He wanted to.

Scientists, philosphers and athiests who question that the universe has a cause, are almost certainly not aware of the ridiculous amount of coincidences that makes it possible for the Earth to sustain life. By means of analogy, it's like saying that the city of Brisbane just came into being when the right bits of material fell into place. The chances of that happening are so astronomically low that it's easier to say that it would never happen. That'll be explored in the next post :)

I hope you guys have learned something today. This is a pretty amazing topic, and if you wanted to approach it you'd see that the Creationists and the theists are the ones who hold all the cards. God is glorified through the use of science and philosophy!

p.s. I don't source everything, because if you're interested in this topic you really should research yourself. Don't just take my word for it. Also, wikipedia is full of evolutionists.

Accuracy. Final Part C

2009-08-03T23:02:00.002+10:00

HARRO EVERYONE. I'm still reeling over the results of RICE (it resulted in a close friend getting saved! Hooray! :D:D:D:D:D:D:D) and how successful it was. I hope everybody had a blast and will get together for next year's event!

Right. To the topic of the day - prophecy. We know in the New Testament that Jesus Christ was a man who walked on the Earth. But what sort of man was He? If, perchance, you decided do dive into the prophecies in Genesis 12, Genesis 17, Genesis 49, Numbers 24, Isaiah 11, Jerimiah 23 (just to name six of the ONE HUNDRED or more), you'd discover that He wasn't just a man. He was the fulfilment of the prophecies that were written down centuries, even millenia, before His birth.

Jesus Christ is the inescapable link between the New and the Old Testament. He is the proof to us that one side of the bible is dependent on the other. Historical data states that Jesus Christ was born, lived, and died exactly as the bible predicted. It's that simple. Jesus Christ fulfilled at least 100 specific prophecies in the bible. The chances of that occuring by coincidence are second to none, like the chances of something appearing out of nothing.

Something appearing out of nothing will be the next topic - the Creation vs Evolution debate as explored by the RICE evangelism team.

Accuracy Part B!

2009-08-02T23:02:00.001+10:00

Secular (not religious) historians of the time, including Flavius Josephus and Cornelius Tacitus both confirm the existence of Jesus Christ, and indeed wrote about Him in a positive light. These aren't just ordinary people - they wrote texts that are accepted as being accurate histories of the times when Jesus Christ was alive.

Think for a second. If Jesus Christ did really exist, and a group of His followers gathered and wrote a ridiculous and fanciful story about salvation, death and resurrection, they would have been immediately discredited and shut down. In the true Roman style, any texts they would have written would have immediately been burned, hoping that they stamp out any cult-like behaviour.

But the word of God and the four gospels, accounts of Jesus Christ and his works on the earth, survive to this day and were accepted by much of the Jewish and Roman populace as the truth. That in itself is pretty much testament to how reliable they are. A gathering of five thousand people, fed and watered from just five loaves of bread and two fish (John 6:1-15) and turning water into wine at a wedding (John 2:1-11) are both easily verifiable by people of those times, and only if they were true would the accounts hold true. They've held, and have never been refuted by any sort of archaeological and scientific evidence.

The four gospels were contemporary accounts of Jesus' life - written by people who travelled with Him, knew His teachings and were familiar with His followers. They contain verifiable, historical facts, and are as such the most accurate representation of Christ Jesus. On the other hand, the later-written Gnostic gospels (such as the gospel of Mary, the gospel of Philip) are not reputable sources, written centuries after Christ's resurrection and ascension. These accounts are not only controversial, but they make claims that are far-removed (and often contrary) to the original gospels.

If we can believe the four gospels are true, then by association, the rest of the bible is true also. Thus - 2 Tim 3:16a – All scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training.

Stay tuned for part C! :D

RICE :D

2009-08-01T23:58:00.002+10:00

RICE was awesome. I hope all of you realise that of our targeted audience attendance of 150, we overshot our original estimate and ended with almost double the number of young people that we were prepared for. It was an awesome night with an awesome environment.

I praise God for allowing us to do His work in Brisbane. I pray that he lets us continue doing this awesome work for as long as Brisbane is around! And I also praise Him that many people turned to Christ today.

And my biggest praise point of them all - throughout the whole of the event, my urticaria didn't develop into even a smallest itch. NOT EVEN A SMALL ITCH. And it didn't until we finished the event and started the Expo. I'm amazed at how awesome God is - even my little illness mattered in such times! Surely we can depend on Him to spread the gospel to the four corners of the world.

Question 3 - Accuracy of the Bible - Part A

2009-07-31T23:26:00.004+10:00

Whee! 1 MORE SLEEP TO RICE! This is a most exciting period of time for us RICE people - all our hard work will finally come to an awesome final product! Pray for all of us guys that our event will be successful and get the youth of Brisbane saved and intrested in doing work for God's causes.

Alright, onto the third issue covered by the Evangelism team. The question is "Is the bible accurate?" - Part A, because this one was really interesting!

This one was an awesome fun one to research. While doing it, I uncovered some pretty awesome things - for example, like the bible talks about DINOSAURS. Let's have a look-see. In the book of Job (and also in Psalms and Isaiah) the bible makes reference to some pretty exotic animals - notably a Behemoth (Job 40:15), a Leviathan (Job 41:1) and a 'Tanniyn', which is nowadays translated in the bible as a dinosaur, or a serpent. Interestingly, none of these creatures survive today.

Behemoths are described in Job as herbivores, with a 'tail sway[ing] like cedar', its 'bones are a tube of bronze' and its 'limbs are like rods of iron'. I'm pretty sure none of our herbivorian creatures have the SUPER-STRENGTH-armour plating as described by the book of Job, and instead I'm convinced that it describes an ankylosaur.

Leviathans are described as fire-breathing (41:19) and are pretty tough (read chapter 41!). We know of some animals that can use fire as a defense mechanism (think bombardier beetles) and thus it is theoretically possible that Leviathans could exist. They're pretty awesome anyhow.

Tanniyns are harder to pinpoint in the bible, as they are nowadays translated as 'dinosaur'. Some translations also use the word 'dragon'. Dragons were pervasive in many medieval tales, which makes me wonder if they really did exist, given the similarity of the legendary beast all over ancient texts from all around the world.

In order to fully appreciate this, the book of Job was written sometime between 1200BC - 100BC, when they had no fossil evidence of dinosaurs. Given that the first fossil of a dinosaur, an Iguanadon, was discovered in AD1822, there can be little or no doubt that this ancient but important and relevant text is inspired by a greater power.

More in Part B, because I've only just warmed up! But tomorrow, or else I'll never sleep :)

Hope to see you all at RICE. If you can't make it, then please, spend a little time to pray for us!

Evangelism - Free Will

2009-07-30T23:34:00.003+10:00

Yesterday, instead of being "the" evangelism guy, I should have been "one of the" evangelism guys. The evangelism team did an awesome job - and I hope the people we reached out to will be convicted enough to take a second step forward!

Second up is the question of 'free will'.

The issue of free will and predestination go hand in hand. If God truly is all-knowing, all-powerful and everywhere at the same time, then isn't it true that we do not actually have free will? Meaning that as God already knows what we will do, then actually doing it has no real purpose.

Free will is always a tricky one to tackle. But the answer is simple! If God created us in His image (Genesis 1:27), and if God has a will, then we, by association, have a will as well. Simple. God, knowing so well that Adam and Eve would take the fruit of knowledge, still allowed them to continue. As humans, we are all given the power to choose whether to follow God or not.

Most importantly, for Christians, we are given the ability to choose. Regardless of whether God is pleased with our choices, He will love us forever. As Christians, it is then our perogative to go out and do God's will, because we are His children.

Anyhow, that's it. If I got anything wrong, drop me a comment or email :).

I can't believe that I've finally got myself some blisters from bass guitar playing. I just hope it goes down before RICE E2, or else playing bass will be a little bit tricky!

Evangelism Q1 - Predestination

2009-07-29T23:26:00.005+10:00

I guess, seeing as I had a role in RICE E1 as the evangelism guy, now is a pretty good time to share all the stuff we brushed up on. Just to know (and for a chance for me to teach it! Because that way I should theoretically remember 95% of it... which is GOOD).

First up is the issue of Predestination.

Predestination is the idea that we, as human beings, were predestined from birth for heaven or hell. While this is true, God gave us free will so that we could choose to follow His way or the world. With the acceptance of these simultaneous truths (you can't have one or the other, or else your view of this issue is one-sided) a few questions arise.

Are we saved by faith? Or did God come down and reach out His saving hand? Or is it a combination of the two?

In the Old Testament, God saved only the Godly men, with the bible emphasising that point repeatedly. (For example, in Genesis 6:9, it describes Noah as being 'blameless' and 'walking with the Lord'.) From this, we can conclude that only people that fit both criterion, faith and God's saving hand, can be saved.

However, after Jesus' sacrifice for our sins changes this situation completely. His sacrifice, His act of pure and utter love for us, bridges the gap between God and us that developed due to our sin. He makes it possible for us to have a loving, personal relationship with God.

We know from Paul's teachings, (1 Corinthians 3:6) that even though that we may plant the seeds of faith and water it, God is the one that makes it grow. It is the same with our own personal relationship with Christ. The seed may have been planted and watered, but it is only by God's saving grace and will that we are saved. In the same way, the seed inside us may have been planted by other people, but it could have only taken root if God had allowed it so. God has effectively predestined us for heaven.

But what is the point of this discussion? Is it worth getting all mixed up in the issue of predestination? No! What is more important is that God knows and wants to know every single one of you, and that is a pretty obvious act of love. As the guys know from 1 Timothy, we need to not get ensnared up in all the grey areas of Christianity. As long as the focus is on God and living His word.

To non believers, this is a pretty troubling thought, especially as many understand the ethics of our way of life and know that "so-and-so from my family will definitely end up in hell if it exists. God can't be good if he predestined them." I say (not argue! Never argue as an evangelist! I think that was rule number 1 haha), "God gave all of us a choice."

Just a shout out for UQES (although I'm pretty sure you guys who read my blog are already members, with the exception of YOU KNOW WHO who studies at another university some distance away. You have a christian organisation there, don't you? JOIN IT). It's such an awesome thing, to see people brave enough at uni to stick their hands up and follow God even in the midst of so much hatred for religion.

(p.s. guys if I got anything wrong, feel free to correct me)

Overcommitment

2009-07-28T23:07:00.003+10:00

Well, here it is. I've finally screwed up royally, and as I'm overcommitted I can't do a single thing about it.

Guys, make sure you don't overcommit. First comes God, secondly family, then finally academics and co-curricular. There's no question about it. Don't make the same mistakes I did, and prioritise badly. Don't ever take anything for granted, because it's not always there.

Given that I'm now being forced by my illness to consider a life that does not revolve around the cello, it strikes me that I'm committing to a whole bunch of stuff that I really don't need. QYS is not important. Sola is not important (although it pains me to say that!). Chamber and UQ orchestra are not important either, but I can't get out of them because they're compulsory for my course.

I may negotiate dropping a few of these ensembles (in this order - QYS / Chamber / UQ orchestra / Sola, but only if I have to. I doubt I will get this bad, but... eh. Contingencies) but all in all I've realised I'm too busy. I don't even have a steady job and I'm too busy. What is money, anyway, when you don't have time to enjoy it?

Rice!

2009-07-27T21:25:00.003+10:00

RICE E1 was awesome fun. Ridiculous stage entertainment, hilarious games and just an awesome atmosphere to be in. I hope all of you guys are intending to come to E2! Keep an eye out for the guy who can't play bass guitar but tries anyway.

Evangelism at E1 was an interesting job - there were three or four people who seriously wanted to learn about church and youth groups. The rest of them were high school age kiddies who just wanted to have fun in a safe and happy environment.

I guess what I learned from E1 is that in order to do proper evangelism, you've got to man up and approach people! For someone like me, that isn't easy (I'm really quite outgoing, if I've known you for longer than, say, six months). I'm generally happy to judge people from a distance - which is not a good trait to have. It shows paranoia and insanity on a stick.

Guys - come to RICE E2 and learn who God should be in your life. That is all :D

I'm back!

2009-07-26T22:52:00.003+10:00

Hey guys, I'm back. And please don't ask for clarification of the last post, there will be none.

Currently, God is really showing His power in my life. Firstly is the case of the Australian Concertos and Vocal Festival, up in Townsville.

I wasn't prepared for what would happen to me when I got up there. Firstly, when I sat down to play, my hives sprang up about a third of the way into the first movement. Then, to try and take my mind off that, I tried to play harder and more dramatically. Not surprisingly, the usual thing that happens to cellists when they overexert themselves happened, in the form of a severe cramp in my wrist.

So what could I do? After having played half of my first movement (I wasn't even up to the cadenza yet) I was struggling to hold my bow and to cross strings. I think the following half an hour was the most painful cello playing I have ever done. I'm proud of myself for slogging through it, but at the same time I was upset and rather embarrassed by the fact that six months of work was lost. I didn't even play half the semiquaver passages, and I fudged the last page of the concerto entirely.

This horrible embarrassment was put roughly into perspective for me very quickly, when I was notified by a friend that a cellist that I've worked with and respect had been checked into Townsville general hospital after suffering a paralysing stroke, meaning her bow hand was just about useless dead weight right now.

Even as I think back on it right now I find it hard to believe that as people our lives hang in a terrible balance. One slight nudge, one small health issue, one small mentality issue, and we can fail so terribly and irreparably. Contrast this: what happened to me was under my control. What happened to her is completely out of her control.

Friends, I know this is a bit odd, but you have to put your faith and time in something that will last. God is eternal, and omnipotent. He will not fail, as I have failed, and she has failed. God will never fail, and He will always be there.

Lack of Updates

2009-07-20T10:06:00.001+10:00

Hey guys,

Sorry for not updating.

I'm not going to be updating until we sort something out, lest I write something I regret.

Please direct your questions to the nearest inanimate object :)

- Michael

Chat

2009-07-14T02:03:00.003+10:00

When was the last time you seriously sat down with yourself and asked "how's it going?"

In a world where peer pressure is immense and achievement is based on results, it's often easy to lose track of oneself in your pursuits. In many ways, my current illness has forced me to take a new perspective on what I do, and have to resolve to work harder. How do I continue playing cello at my level if I'm allergic to my own sweat?

Not harder, but smarter. For the first time, I'm worrying that this illness will have a debilitating effect on my future career and my life. Mum says it won't be permanent, but at the way things are going, it doesn't seem to be any better and I have to weather it out. Performing with such a strange allergy certainly won't be easy (I'll tell you guys how Saturday goes, haha!).

This, and the combination of cello and RICE, is probably my first serious test as a Christian. Even though people don't think that it's too much of a problem, there's only so much itch I can take before I have to run off stage screaming abuse at the nearest cold object. I'm praying for God to help me resolve this soon, in the hope that it won't affect my university studies or the time I spend playing the cello / bass guitar / singing / piano.

I won't be updating tomorrow night because I'll be on a plane. I hope you guys have less to worry about than I do, and enjoy the rest of your holidays! :)

I hate my sinuses.

2009-07-13T00:52:00.003+10:00

Currently, with my sinuses blocked and the fact that lifts in Hong Kong are quite common, it's a little bit of an issue adjusting the inner ear pressure in my head. What I instead get to live with is a feeling that something is trying to bake a cake within my skull, leading to much headacheness and a slight emotional fail.

It's great having cousins around, I do miss seeing them every time I go to Australia. It's a bit odd though, because I don't see them at all, I tend to turn a blind eye to anything annoying that they do when I do get to see them. And I guess they do that to me too.

Double standards suck, but you'll find that we as people have double standards for everything. But here's the catch - God has one standard, and one standard only, and that's PERFECTION. Hang on, you ask. How can God expect us to be perfect? He allowed Satan into the world to lead us to sin against Him and His word.

But wait. For God so loved the world that He sent His one and only son, that whoever believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life. - John 3:16. Here's guessing that this is the only promise that ultimately matters in the end. God has called us to His side, and it's our responsibility as members of the church to minister to those that do not yet believe. :)

Grumps

2009-07-12T00:03:00.002+10:00

A few people today had an attack of the grumps while the family was having dinner. This was severely juxtaposed by a hyperactive little kid and an opinionated uncle, making dinner a rather impressively awkward situation to be at.

I guess I'm always trying too hard to think about the impression that I make on people, but it's not because I'm vain or narcissistic. I'm always trying to make sure that I do the right thing by everyone, and avoid raising controversy if I can.

On another note, RICE is going to be awesome, I hope I see you all there! Check out www.ricebrisbane.org for more info. It's going to be an awesome event - and we're hoping to get as many of you high-schoolers there as we can. So register now! Also for your chance to win a T-shirt! :D

That's pretty much it for today. I stayed inside, hoping to get better... we are in the middle of typhoon season and one's passing by just south of us now. Hopefully it blows out before tuesday, or else I won't be making it back!

Illness and Old Photos

2009-07-10T23:24:00.004+10:00

Here's a really awesome photo of my mum (right) back in the day. I'm sure she doesn't mind me sharing this (actually, I'm not...) but today was pretty much the first time I've seen all the photos from when she was growing up! It's strange - my preconception of what she looked like when she was younger was actually very off.

I'm currently cooped up in my house as I've got Chris' fever. Boo for Chris! I feel rather terrible, but I think I've consumed enough water to flush it all out. However, with the help of paracetamol and antihistamines, I've been able to scrape myself together for long enough to go outside.

I bought a lot of sheet music today. Debussy, Elgar, Sibelius, Borodin string quartets, Cesar Franck sonata, and Ysaye solo sonata. Couldn't find the Villa-Lobos quartets though.... may have to resort to internets!

Apologies for the not-very-lucid post, I'm having trouble concentrating. :(

Tour

2009-07-09T23:10:00.000+10:00

Above is a photo of me and some of the guys on tour, embarrassing ourselves by singing random songs in the middle of the Newcastle markets. We had a grand old time, especially the fact that we were a) not NSW-ers, b) music students, and c) singing in Latin, Spanish and other languages.

Today I watched a lovely Japanese movie which won the Toronto(?) film festival. It's called 'Departed', and it was about a cellist who just doesn't make it as a musician, and accidentally finds himself in the equivalent of a funeral home, preparing the bodies for cremation. It was a macabre tale, the intense juxtaposition of birth, death, life, and the afterlife, with a very interesting plot and convincing characterisation. I recommend it to you guys, even though as a musician I had a bit of a narky moment when I realised he was dubbed.

Thinking back, I'm pretty sure the highlight of this month is the chance to bond with the choir. It's been an awesome experience and I hope I can stay in the choir for the next 7 (yes, SEVEN) years, if I stay in Brisbane.

YF camp was also quite the awesome. I praise God and thank Him for giving the leaders initiative to organise it, and that it all went smoothly. Just a little annoyed at not being in the group photo! I WENT! *grumble*.

ITCHY

2009-07-08T22:33:00.000+10:00

HONG KONG IS HOT.
HONG KONG IS HUMID.
I AM ITCHY AND MISERABLE.

(That's all I'm able to write today, I'm stuffed.)

Bothering

2009-07-07T22:57:00.002+10:00

I'm back from my 5-day adventure (and I'll probably write more tomorrow, depending on whether I'm tired or not). Living in close proximity with very good friends (firstly Christians at YF camp, then non-Christians at choir tour) juxtaposed the behaviors and the attitudes of Christians, and the semi-ignorance that non-Christians live in.

On the choir tour, I was constantly thinking about the image that I, as a Christian, was putting forward. Was I doing God justice? Was I devoted to Him, even whilst being submerged in the ethics of a non-Christian world? I'm pretty sure I did... but then, there were always situations that I could have done better. For example, not getting frustrated at slow people (yes, SLOW people) and not showing off.

Another thing that's been bothering me though is a comment that two of my friends made on tour - that 'ANYBODY IS A CHRISTIAN ONCE THEY ACCEPT JESUS CHRIST INTO THEIR HEART', whilst also adding that forgiveness is there for anybody who asks and repents. They also then told me not to 'judge Christians by what they do'. Truthfully, I felt rather insulted.

What's the definition of repent? It's a little bit different to a confession, in a Catholic sense. Repentance is (by definition from dictionary.com) 'to feel sorry, self-reproachful, or contrite for past conduct; regret or be conscience-stricken about a past action, attitude, etc.' Part of Christian repentance is, however, turning from the ways of the world and following God. It's not following the ways of the world and then asking God for forgiveness. Guys, I could be wrong, and if I am, please correct me.

On a happier note, the tour was awesome fun, especially the four games of Mafia that lasted until 2am in the morning. I also had steak and chips for lunch for the first time in my life. And ramen for dinner. Most amusing.

Away

2009-07-03T10:56:00.001+10:00

I'm going to be incommunicado for the next few days. YF camp and Newcastle tour, here I come :D

Insomnia and Cholinergic Urticaria

2009-07-02T23:38:00.002+10:00

By no means a stranger to allergies, I was very very surprised when my skin condition was diagnosed today as an allergy. Yep, I have an allergy to my own SWEAT, or rather (in medical mumbo-jumbo) Cholinergic Urticaria. It's a very uncomfortable place to be. Horrendous self pity, here I come.

I found my DS today (after searching very high and very low), which cheered me up a little. Today was actually a very cheerful day! I finished Orwell's 1984 again (I do love the book) and read Mr. Men comics in the doctor's waiting room. It made me smile, especially at the notion of Mr. Chatterbox's magic hat and Mr. Brave rocking up late to lunch with Little Miss Trouble.

I must admit that through this sickness my spritiual life has died (only in these past few days! I swear!) and I hope by telling everybody I'll get myself off my bum and actually study the Bible tonight, as opposed to reading it and then giving up. I wasn't able to sleep though, and the milk in the fridge was off.

The best cure for insomnia is a glass of warm/hot milk. It really does work. Either that or a frying pan to the face.

I have losted it.

2009-07-02T00:27:00.002+10:00

So, the holiday season is here, and I've begun by losing my handheld game console of choice, the nintendo DS. Also, with it, my favourite pokemon game, which is actually quite annoying as I was pretty much finished.

But instead I found some old stuff that cheers me up. A really sweet birthday card from an old friend that he wrote some eight, nine years ago, a tube of funny stickers and a few sticker-booth photo sets. Although I've lost my DS, these things are ultimately worth more to sentimental old me than a stupid piece of technology that I could replace. I can't replace these any more than I could turn back the clock and be in grade 5 again.

It also got me thinking. Here I am, searching high and low with all my might for something that's worth approximately $200. And yet I don't search high and low for God's promises, which last for eternity. What a fickle and strange being I am. Yet, telling you this, I don't feel any sort of desire to search for God any moreso than I am at this point in time.

I guess it's the trivial human complex that I embody. It doesn't make sense. In one of Anthony Evan's songs (he's a GREAT Christian singer, by the way) he sings "even though you knew I would run, you let me go. You let me go to the end of my being, knowing that I would come back" - (not the actual words). Are we still running away? Probably. But if you can call yourself a Christian, you were predestined to meet God and experience His love.

Busy

2009-07-01T00:10:00.002+10:00

I'm terrible at relaxing - I've never been able to find time in my life to chill and to take time off. Always had stuff to do, even when I'm on holiday / trip, and it eventually wears me down. Often, I find that the busier I am, the faster my health goes after I've done all the things of critical importance (such as exams and the like).

Currently, I am suffering from skin allergies, which result in mildly paralysing itches (paralysing because it's all over my body, which means I can't actually decide where to scratch). While this is hilariously fun, it's further compounded by the flu and fever and the general day-to-day allergic reaction to pollen.

However, to put things into perspective - I'm lucky. I'm physically capable, and this itch, while annoying, isn't life-threatening or damaging to my long-term livelihood. I should count myself blessed. With this itch, at least I can be sure that I'm human :D

Consequence

2009-06-29T23:26:00.003+10:00

Have you guys ever taken the time to read James chapter 2? In it, it details why we as Christians need to do what we need to do. By today's sociological definition, anybody who believes in the concept of a higher being is religious, and if that so happens to be God, then that person is defined as Christian. However, this isn't all that being a Christian is about.

Firstly - true Christians are always easy to identify. This is because they live a Christ-centric life, put all their decisions and worries in God's hands, and let Him take care of it. This does not mean that they shirk all responsibility - it is making sure that you're doing the right thing by God and also the right thing for yourself.

Part of 'doing right by God' (and I use this phrase loosely - we are all sinners, so we have fallen short of God's glory [Romans 3:23]) is that we need to do works in the name of faith. Yes, all it takes to become a Christian is to believe in Jesus Christ and his sacrifice for our sins, but being a Christian needs to be maintained.

And finally, if people tell you that they are a Christian, watch their behaviour. It's always easy to identify the true nature of that person by looking at their sincerity in their spiritual walk with God.

Gigs

2009-06-28T23:40:00.002+10:00

I love playing at random gigs, even if the music is slightly odd and the audience is slightly balding. As long as the music is intellectually stimulating (and yes, this is subjective), I find it's quite easy to get into the mood of a performance and to give a convincing one.

That being said - sometimes I just hate audiences. At school, the audience would talk between pieces. At university, the audience won't talk - they'll just sit there and cough, sneeze, shuffle, and rustle their papers. In many ways, it's quite distracting.

If we could solve this problem I'd be 90000% happier.

Boredom

2009-06-27T11:55:00.000+10:00

Because I have nothing to do, I do nothing. It's horrible. Then I complain about being bored, which is also horrible. I've been able to get myself a few gigs as an accompanist (hey, it pays!)... which sort of take a little off the monotony, but still...

Note to self - whenever bringing my own keyboard to a gig, I need to remember to bring my own amplifier. Some people these days have really really cheapo PA systems that don't have a standard input and instead have an RCA/3.5mm, which is pretty uber fail.

I've noticed that I don't sleep very well either during the holidays. MUST sleep more, starting tomorrow.

Worship from the Heart

2009-06-26T23:50:00.002+10:00

I guess the most important point about leading worship / being in a worship team is the ability to worship from the heart, through an instrument. The instrument is merely a tool, to help us focus more on God and what He's done for us.

Today, Billy's church held a worship service/jam session for anybody who wanted to turn up. This was beneficial to all the kids who came and listened, and for us musicians (we quickly got tired of the novelty of playing by ear, and started actually listening to the message!). And the music wasn't half bad.

So what's to learn from that? There are people out there, hundreds and thousands and tens-of-thousands out there, who can play music brilliantly. But in the end, it doesn't matter - if the instrumentalist can do their job without causing undue stress (think the sound guy adjusting microphones during group prayer time, and getting loud, abrupt feedback), then all is well. Anyhow, the focus is on God.

Might be going back to Hong Kong in a matter of weeks, depending on whether I can find the time to take a holiday between now and a competition. I think I can. If I'm going, it'll be for a week, and it'll be fun. I'll even be able to come back with a PS3 (if parentals allow. I think the chances are slim. It's sitting there unused in our apartment... with two brand-new games. What a waste! Of money, as it sits there, and of my time when it comes over).

Happy holidays, friends

Demotivation

2009-06-25T23:40:00.002+10:00

Now that exams have come and gone, I've become the biggest couch potato. I complain that I'm bored, but won't sit down and do some actual work. I hope that by confessing to you guys I'll actually wake up and practice music or something like that. Or do some RICE work.

I had a great time today, booking return flights to townsville and back for the North Queensland concertos comp. I failed pretty badly because the newbie call center people have little/no idea what a cello is, and consequently don't know the protocols for handling them. If there were an airline that could offer me tickets without this delay, and even if it were slightly more expensive, I'd buy them. Rather than spending 4-and-a-bit hours on the phone to Qantas/Jetstar representatives explaining that contrary to their beliefs, my 1.3m tall cello will fit in a seat.

Ahh well.

Maybe after trying so hard to get a seat I'll actually practice for the competition. After all, that's the reason I'm going up there.

Worship

2009-06-24T11:58:00.001+10:00

As I've been studying this kind of stuff at uni, I guess it's time to raise this issue. Worship matters, yes, but are we allowing the music to take over? Musicians will agree with me that it's much easier to lose yourself in the meaning of the song and get taken over by the song itself, thereby detracting from the message that is intended.

So, what's the big deal? If we allow music to take over the message, then ultimately we fail in the act of worship. If we, as the worship team, get too caught up by the music, then it's about us and not Jesus. It's finding the balance that's the issue.

There's a saying that says "the perfect [musical] technique is the one you don't notice." And there aren't many other times where it's more important. Yes, we can have good music, but the musicians need to be competent. Yes, we can have awesome songs, but the intent has to be on Jesus. Yes, it's easy to get carried away, but all you have to do is ignore everybody else and focus on your own personal act of worship.

For musicians, this is especially hard. The music has to be perfect or else it detracts from the message. For other people, if the music is too good then it detracts from the message. It's hard to find a balance in this. For people who are (unfortunately) tone-deaf, all music sounds good to them, so it's the songs that the worship team chooses that matters. It's all a matter of balance.

It's Over

2009-06-23T22:20:00.003+10:00

Well, Patrick the Maltese x Shitsu has gone home. His owners live in Calamvale (a little while away) and we have no idea how he got here. Oh well. We can't expect to keep him now, can we?

Tomorrow marks the first day of my holidays, after I finish this ridiculously huge exam on Classical/Renaissance/Medieval history. Huge because we had eight lectures and two tutorials, and each of them was just purely content based. And they can drop any sort of ridiculous question on you, ranging from the usual "what is" to more obscure "Who composed the piece _____?"

Hopefully I won't go too bad. Me and my 17 pages of notes. I know, 17 is not a lot, but in my note-taking style it is. Last year I got through my physics and chemistry final exams with 3 pages of notes each. It's all relative, and yet somehow I think there's a lot more in this exam then there is in anything else I've had.

Thanks to everybody who's praying for me now. :)

Lost Dogs are Detrimental to Study Habits

2009-06-22T23:35:00.005+10:00

The results are in - if you pick up someone else's dog (when it's pouring outside and it's very obviously lost), you won't be dedicating much time to study. Alex found this dog on his way to work, and had the heart to pick him up and bring him home.

We haven't found the owners yet, but RSPCA and the council are searching for us. In the meantime, it lives in Billy's room. It's a little Shitsu x Maltese puppy, and it's absolutely adorable. It also has an attitude and doesn't understand that he's trespassing in Kiara and Zodi's territory.

God is good, hey? Even cares about the little dogs. If dogs mean that much to Him, how much more are we worth? Even though we understand what we do wrong (and yet continue doing those things) God loves us more than we could ever imagine. (If you want perspective, ask Ross).

Billy calls the dog 'puppy', Mum 'bobo' and I call him anything that comes into mind, including my awesome arsenal of 'stinky', 'poopy', 'puff' and 'klutz'. Hope his owner calls soon (if not, is anybody happy to look after a dog? haha)

Better study up on my medieval/renaissance and essay questions tomorrow.

Regret

2009-06-21T22:52:00.000+10:00

Just thought I'd share something I learned rather painfully (after having a trick played on me by friends sometime during high school). With the advent of the internet, it's possible for anybody to write anything, post photos of anything without having to be liable for it (in most cases). And it's up to the end user, people like us, to be smart enough to read through the piles and piles of junk whilst trying to avoid stuff that takes us away from our core beliefs.

From personal experience, it is certainly much easier to avoid something completely than to see/do/utilise it and try to forget about it afterwards. No matter how hard you try, unless your brain shuts down, you'll remember it for the rest of your life. Awkward and embarrassing memories often pop up at the most inappropriate moments (I had the memory of myself and a good friend acting out a scene from a movie when we were in grade 2. It involved shoes and heads.) and although you forgive yourself for it, it never really truly goes away.

So, grab ahold of your great moral compass (it's the Bible for those of you who don't know!) and live life according to God's word. And I promise you there will be no regrets.

Juxtaposition

2009-06-20T23:43:00.002+10:00

Audiences that talk during concerts, small children that are forced to play music and professional obsessiveness. Three types of people that we get to meet as musicians, and I met them today. The juxtaposition was huge.

I do think that I am truly blessed by having parents that are open-minded enough to let me study music and be a (very) significant drain on their resources. I'm thankful that God has provided.

I think, now that I practice every day, Spanish music is fast becoming my favourite style of music. Brooding melodies, abrupt rhythms and dramatic flair suits my playing style to the T, whereas with Beethoven and Bach, I screw up the spirit of the piece.

Speaking of spirit, RICE worship team rehearsal tomorrow! Woohoo! Also, evangelism team meeting tomorrow. Woohoo! So looking forward to it.

Reverse

2009-06-19T23:03:00.002+10:00

And draw 2. I didn't know how much my string quartet was being paid, but it was twice what I was expecting. Twice! Thus I can actually afford to pay for the parking ticket, having budgeted with less money than I did. God is good. :)

Currently my car is covered in ants, ant killer, and dirt. It's rather annoying, as it means I won't be able to drive it for a little while, but... oh well! At least it's a problem I can solve and that is under my control, as opposed to traffic and weather.

I think I've found a new favourite book of the Bible. Titus (a tiny little book - 3 chapters, wedged in between 2 Timothy and Philemon) is a very enlightening text, and it's very very very relevant to us as Christians today. Especially chapter 3 - "Avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless". Paul's teaching us to be both efficient and to be good!

Verse 14 - "Our people must learn to devote themselves to doing what is good, in order that they may provide for daily necessities and not live unproductive lives". Provide for daily necessities! Paul understands what we have to go through as humans. It's reassuring to know that God's word allows for us to make mistakes.

I can't believe that I can still feel like something good could come out of my horrible day yesterday... but thanks to God! :)

Also - guys, please pray for my mum. She has diverticulitis (pockets in her intestines) that get infected easily... I'm praying that she find strength and healing through God!

Bad day

2009-06-18T22:15:00.002+10:00

Everybody has bad days. I got one pretty much today. From smashing my head on the boot lid of my car, to leaving my dress shoes in the car and dashing the kilometer each way just to get them, today was a day riddled with great annoyance to the point of "STUFF YOU, STUPID WORLD".

Oh, and I've got ants in my car again. Also, I got a parking ticket. I purchased a permit ($3!) and when I closed the door I must have created a gust of wind that blew the ticket over, so it couldn't be seen from the outside. Lamest $50 I have ever spent.

But after I had a big whinge (to myself, by myself, while driving to tutorials after uni... 10 hours of cello! yay! I LOVE THIS :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D) I felt better. Because God is still on my side, no matter what. I was being petty - small things are, after all, small things. I'm not in extreme financial difficulties, I don't have to feed a family and ultimately if I screw up big time I still have parents I can fall back on.

dcTalk were singing when I was driving away from uni - saying 'some people need to learn the hard way'. I think I've learned the hard way, and I'm going to be triple-checking my stupid parking permit before I leave!

Faith in the Unseen

2009-06-17T22:52:00.003+10:00

From 'My Mind's Eye' by dcTalk- "I've never seen the wind. I've seen the effects of the wind, but I've never seen the wind. It's just a mystery to me".

DcTalk are an awesome band - and they write good songs too. When they refer to the wind, they use it as a comparison between 'seeing' and 'believing'. But how do we 'prove' things to people? I personally find it frustrating when friends (some with phenomenally high IQs) refuse to even entertain the notion of God - even though, as Christians, we can see the effect of Him in our lives.

Intelligence isn't a measure of wisdom. Neither is maturity. But what of proof? We don't have any proof that God exists, or otherwise. To borrow a lyric from that same song - "Our faith is the proof of the things unseen". We put faith in the wind - we know it's there. Science can verify it. We put faith in God - we know He's there.

If people knew the God we knew, they would definitely have the time for Him.

Habits

2009-06-16T20:26:00.001+10:00

I have many odd quirks / habits that define who I am. It's quite interesting to note how people around me subconsciously pick up these same habits as well - although I don't ever notice it when I do it myself. For example, I have a habit of listening to the same song / playlist over and over and over until I know the pieces back to front.

Bad habits, however, are the real reason why I consistently fail at what I do. From the reflex action in my pinky fingers that I let develop (in my cello technique), to chewing at my fingernails, bad habits are the way that I decide 'hey, I'll just let my subconscious do the talking because I can't be stuffed paying attention to what I do'.

And that's also a bad habit.

It's important to let good habits develop (i.e. choosing to read the Bible daily over BATTLING POKEMANS ONLINE. This is one resolution I've made and kept! Surprising.) and to keep at them. This was about a three months ago - and I've only missed one night's worth of Bible reading. Truth be told, I actually felt guilty and resolved to make sure that I kept at it.

So come on guys, bring out the good habits :)

Failure

2009-06-15T22:48:00.003+10:00

FAIL.

It's hard to define, and it'll come and bite most of us given even the slightest chance, but today I'm pretty sure I understand what failure means to me. Failure, as it pertains to me, is what happens when I don't give my best, and (consistently) feel disappointed in what I did. Success is what happens when I give my best, regardless of the result.

I know many of you will disagree with my view, but what failure is is a straight refusal to do your best. Everything else that happens is a consequence of this rather destructive attitude. A lot of the time failure leads to sinning by omission - not speaking up and doing the right thing. And yes, it is a sin. A pretty easy one to commit.

I have better things to do than fail, but yet I'm always tempted to fail just that much harder. Got to get myself out of this destructive cycle. Hmm..

Just a short post today

2009-06-14T21:56:00.008+10:00

After 4 hours of singing, I'm exhausted. Crazy conductor! I can't believe she's brave enough to schedule two two-hour concerts on the same day. Shameless plug for my choir - Sola Voce.

I feel exhausted, and content. I don't want anything else that I don't already have.

I guess contentment is hard to find. Look towards God, and He'll show you all the things you've missed that you should be grateful for! True contentment comes from Him and Him only.

So pleased that RICE is finally here! So excited to have the chance to serve with other devoted brothers and sisters :)

Simple

2009-06-13T23:37:00.002+10:00

Trying to reach out to other people with God's word isn't at all hard - it's trying to break down the social and cultural barriers that exist between us and other people that is. However, guess what? God created every single one of us equal to everybody else. Thus, we actually have nothing to fear.

When people meet you for the first time, they generally try and do one of two things. The first type of person will allow you to dictate the terms of the meeting and the socialising, whilst the second person will try and test you to see what you'll accept and reject as a value and a belief. Here's a thought - how many of us are brave (or, perhaps brash) enough to answer "I'm a Christian" when somebody asks you describe yourself?

Words have to be followed by actions though. I think consistency is the mark of a devoted Christian. Being a Christian should be the defining point of your life, whereas everything else you do will help you carry out the responsibility that God's charged us with (evangelising, fellowship, and the like). I know I don't always come across to people as a person who is Christian, but I'm going to change this. Who wants to join me?

Opinion

2009-06-12T23:47:00.003+10:00

When I was in grade 10, I made the very idiotic mistake of giving my highly uneducated (and positively suicidal) opinion. Not to go into specifics, but, it was a 'give me credit when credit is due' type of opinion, and it was completely and utterly self-obsessed.

To this day, it is the single most humbling experience I have ever had. If not for my anonymous username (if anybody really wanted to find out my actual identity, they could have. I offended an admin), I would have been pounded into a million billion trillion tiny little particles of roadkill. That being said, the people I offended were mature enough to let the me off the hook without bothering me.

James teaches in chapter 3 that the tongue is like a fire. It's a tiny part of the body, but yet it has the greatest influence over other people. Verse 8 says that "... no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison." We know we can't tame it, but we need to do our best at using it properly.

As Christians, we are often watched by our atheist, agnostic and religious counterparts. It's so important to watch what you say because it so often gets us into trouble. By no means will we be perfect, but we need to carefully consider each word that comes out of our mouths so that we will not drive anybody away from the Good News.

It's surprising how much other people notice. A good friend of mine, a very hard-line atheist, confided in me at the end of grade 12 that I was the only person who ever managed to defy his outlook on life. He has had a great deal of hardship in his life, and as such holds on to the view that 'Every person will only do something for selfish gain'.

We can't afford to be selfish. We need to reach out with God's love, or else we will lose many of our friends to the other side. It's for eternity, and yet we've spent most of our highly limited time NOT doing God's work. I feel that if I die not having convinced a majority of my friends to become Christian, I might have some regrets. Use the tongue wisely and you might just manage to do some good with it.

Not winning

2009-06-11T23:45:00.002+10:00

Not winning gives a motivation, a drive, to succeed even more. Or else it can provoke you into giving up. I'm definitely in the former category - if you know me then you know (of course) that I refuse to give up until I reach my goal. (Or, alternatively, I give up because I'm doing something that everybody knows is stupid but are too polite to tell me)

I guess it boils down to how you measure success. I feel that success can only be defined by what you are able to achieve, as opposed to what you already have achieved. In this way, I can make myself work harder.

But what bites back is the fact that I'm never really quite happy with what I've done. For example, I competed in the UQ Bach prize today and was 'commended' (i.e. close, but no cigar!). If I had won, I would have been unhappy because there was so much wrong with my playing. And, as I didn't actually win, I'm thinking of ways to improve my playing.

It's a looong, hard road to perfection. And the end goal is unattainable, anyhow. You can practice and practice and practice, and there will always be something you can do better. Practice doesn't make perfect, it makes permanent.

I'm pretty sure our walk with God is similar. We are always being tempted away, by sin, by guilt, and an inability to forgive, but as long as we focus on the goal, by the grace of God, we can achieve perfection.

Man up, guys, it's so much easier to do this together :)

Context

2009-06-10T23:24:00.002+10:00

Perhaps the biggest thing I'm concerned nowadays (besides all the general stuff of being a uni student!) about is how to interpret the bible correctly. Let's face it - a lot of it is very very vague, sometimes metaphorical, sometimes literal.

What really irks me are people, who don't question the validity of a textbook that they purchase at the shop for a mere sum of money, that go and immediately say 'the bible can't be true'. Even though it is the most studied text in the history of texts, most people will say that it's got no basis in fact, and that its claims are crazy beyond lunacy.

All Scripture is God-breathed (2 Timothy 3:16). In such an important, self-referential book, an assertion like this is evidence of how accurate it is. It just so happens that the bible is perhaps the most consistent holy text, and most of the events in it are verifiable by archaeology. Or rather, nothing in the bible can be disproven by archaeology.

Thus, the consequences of the accuracy of the bible are great. We are held accountable for everything we do. What Paul documents in his epistles hold true; what John saw in his vision in the book of Revelation will hold true. We need to study the bible more, or risk misinterpreting the message and the greater picture!

Refocus

2009-06-09T22:13:00.002+10:00

It seems like being busy is the only way I survive. I work so much harder when I'm busy, and I like it that way. If I don't have enough to do, tedium sets in and I can procrastinate until the cows come home and leave again.

But nowadays I find that more and more, I take a little time out each day to have a chat to God. I'm also trying to find ways to worship Him when I'm doing something else - for example driving. When we drive, we can experience what God has created for our benefit.

Having Anthony Evans playing in the car also helps, because that man is such an inspirational singer and Christian. One day, I hope that I can do the same sort of stuff. I'd like to be able to arrange songs / sing awesomely.

Luke 10:38-42 details the story of Mary and Martha, two sisters who were similarly obsessive. Martha was so busy preparing their house for Jesus that she forgot who Jesus actually was. Mary chose to stay with Jesus, and learn from Him.

We need to refocus and not let our daily lives take over. Christian comes first!

*Quite possibly unrelated - I think Debussy's Nocturnes are awesome. That is all*

Tiny Fish

2009-06-08T22:40:00.004+10:00

As I performed with the Youth Symphony today, it struck me that this world is simultaneously huge and tiny. How is it that we can be so focused on our own lives and not usually have a care for any of these people who turned up on our doorstep, all the way from Albuquerque, New Mexico, to perform? I guess the point I'm trying to make is that we are infinitely small, and this is more important to know.

It's like one of my favourite games, fishy. All we ever do is try and be better than everybody else, but before you realise that there's always a bigger fish in the sea, you get gobbled up and have to start again.

However, what's more amazing about being this tiny is that God is watching. Over every single one of us. Every. Single. One. We might feel big in the little slice of the universe we call our home, but there are billions of us. We have the same sin, the same desires, and the same inane notions of wealth and success. God loves each of us, and knows each of us infinitely better than we know ourselves. And we're tiny.

Ecclesiastes 12:1a says "Remember your Creator in the days of your youth, before the days of trouble come". Cling to God or else we might stumble and forget how infinitely small we are.

And perhaps one day, I'll get to meet up with those guys from Albuquerque again.

Change

2009-06-07T19:45:00.009+10:00

Mark Driscoll had a couple of really poignant points in his sermon, Marriage and Men. We men need to man up a whole lot more before we can actually even consider a relationship with one of God's daughters, even if this ideal goes completely and utterly against the teachings of today.

We see nowadays, through the reports in the media, how race, sexuality and money have become the most hotly debated topics. However, when viewed from a Christian perspective - all these things are moot. We are not entitled to any rights as a human being but are granted them because of God's everlasting love. However, with these rights come responsibility - and this is what a lot of people don't understand.

We don't deserve anything. Jesus gave Himself for us so that we could live, but we also killed the only pure and sinless man who ever walked on this earth. Thus, we are all condemned to death. If the death penalty ever existed, then should all be put to death as murderers.

In Pastor Chong Low's sermon this morning, he outlined the method of forgiveness. Jesus forgave us, and thus we need to forgive others. If we don't forgive others then we shall be held accountable for our own sin. (Matthew 18:23-25, the parable of the unmerciful servant).

Our attitudes need to change.

To SH, NG, DS, MH, ND, JR, TM, CC, ZF, NK, AR - Finally, I'm ready to forgive you. Please forgive me for holding this resentment against you.

The Symphony

2009-06-06T19:36:00.005+10:00

Hello everyone! I've decided to start a blog, because I can. And I'm putting off learning the Keuris double cello concerto, because it needs learning and is hard.

In retrospect, the biggest thing that has happened to me this year is still my baptism. To all the guys at church - I urge you to go for it, because it shows you what you lack in a spiritual walk with God. There is nothing more satisfying than knowing that there is always help at hand. God answers prayer, and He always does - even if the answer is no!

It's a different perspective from last year - going to uni, meeting new friends, fellowshipping with different Christians and having the chance to explore music more and more. The freedom comes with a price; a responsibility. I really need to take care not to lose track of who I am.

Right now, a lot is happening in my life - and I'm sure it's for the better. I don't really know what's going on in terms of the bigger picture, but I'm so very sure that God is looking well and truly after my best interests. This is the comfort I need to know. Psalm 23 is a very good reminder to me as a Christian that God is always there.

There are a few events coming up that I'm extremely excited for - holidays, RICE, YF Camp and the North Queensland Concertos Competition. I'm looking at what I have now, and the blessings I've been given, and the talents that I've been given, and I now feel the desire to serve God through these. RICE in particular - it'll be my second evangelism experience (and the first didn't really count!).

I've been reading Philip Yancey's "Where is God when it hurts?" - dealing on the question of suffering. Panthiests, Athiests and Evolutionists often argue that a sentient God would also have to be an utter sadist to inflict pain upon humankind. What kind of pleasure would we be able to experience if pain was not the complete opposite? What kind of joy would we have if we didn't know how to hurt? These questions are ones that the kids at RICE will definitely ask of us - and the evangelism team needs to be able to address all of these issues! It will be an exciting experience.

Just a thought from 1 Timothy 5:24 - 25 - 'The sins of some men are obvious, reaching the place of judgement ahead of them; the sins of others trail behind them. In the same way, good deeds are obvious, and even those that are not cannot be hidden.'

Conviction, prayer, repentance, forgiveness. Because we believe in Christ, we are not condemned for our sins. His spirit sets us free from the law of sin and death.